RELATIONSHIP 101: A Relationship Is a Covenant...

Greetings to all who believe in love; blessings and much more to all those who are in love; courage and best wishes to all those waiting to find love or for love to find them; and to all those wondering whether or not love works, I say warmest greetings to you, and I trust that love will encounter you in a very special way.

Continuing with my thoughts on relationship 101, I would like to say that we must learn to look at our Marriages and relationships as covenants and not as contracts.

Usually, a contract is what it is because among other things, people in it are expected to specifically perform the responsibilities they have agreed upon to perform (which are in themselves the basis of the contract and the benefits they hope to derive from it). Where these responsibilities are not performed, the defaulting party is held to be in breach of the contract. At this point the party who has suffered this breach (in law called the injured party) is free to terminate the relationship and just walk away.

A covenant on the other hand, and as we see in the works of God, is between two people as well, but the focus is hardly on whether or not the parties are doing to or for each other, what they have promised to do, but on the fact that one is doing what he is supposed to do in the covenant, irrespective of whether or not the other party is honouring his part or responsibility in the agreement. 

The basis of what we do in marriage or in our relationships, is not about the fact that the other party is doing what you expect him/her to do, but about what you are expected to do and whether or not you are willing to do it, in fair and/or harsh weathers. A bad spouse might necessarily give rise to the other's disloyalty to the relationship, but this is not God’s standard.

This maturity cannot be compromised. Get it, imbibe it; 'cause it is only then that you can make the appropriate measure of sacrifice(s) necessary to sustain your relationship. It also helps you to have realistic expectations and prepare yourself to manage the offenses which will come up in your relationship (and they will surely come) wisely. Think about it.

Blessings and more

SHALOM